When the Pain of a Past Hurt Won’t Stop

We all struggle from time to time with past hurts. A friend makes a careless remark that cuts right through you, or your spouse makes a career decision without even consulting you. It may even be deeper or more painful, involving living with a vindictive parent or being severely injured in a hit and run accident. They say “Time heals,” but what if it doesn’t?

When a past hurt keeps cropping up, swirling around in your mind and repeatedly stabbing you in the heart, it’s time to do something about it before it damages you any further. “Forgiving but not forgetting” may sound generous and righteous, but in reality, it is not forgiving at all. Instead, you keep recalling the past hurt and reliving it over and over again. As a result, you actually re-experience the emotions and feel everything as intensely as when it originally happened. This creates chronic physical stress inside you that throws your body out of balance and can lead to illnesses such as high blood pressure and diabetes.

The only way to move on from a past hurt is to move AWAY from it. This requires a conscious decision to forgive the person who did this to you—once and for all—unconditionally. When you are finally able to forgive, you mentally and emotionally step away from the pain and all the anger and despair that have been consuming you.

Stepping away from your past hurts opens you up to new possibilities for your future well-being. You couldn’t see those possibilities before because your unforgiveness and anger were blocking them from view. Now, finally, your life can move toward something new and positive because you are no longer weighed down by your past pain.